the first thing i noticed was how much the bat was abstracting from the whole image. . it should have been placed in a subtler fashion. And it might just be a little too hot on the bald guys head.
I like your post processing work but something overall just seems a little I would say "dead". . I would have tried making some of the wood or the carpet stand out with a little more pop of color so that it doesn't just all blend together.
Having viewed your work of your wife first, I have to say that this, though an astonishing composition, does have the feel of being a commission. It doesn't have the heart in it, and rater than being art, is illustration. A slight, but profound difference. Now, don't get me wrong - this is still brilliant work, it's just that it's business. (Do you agree?) Maybe I don't make sense - I certainly couldn't come within a light year of any of your work. But this lacks the emotive force, substituting the illustrative. Still very collectible.